the curious case of the bather bottom thief.

Well, well, well. What have we here?

We have our first hiccup in village life… and it is a rather odd one. Someone is stealing our bather bottoms.

On Sunday (I think – days here… really hard to keep track of), I went swimming at the beach, which I do most days of late since all the icky tourists (ironic isn’t it) have gone… And I came home to shower, which truly is the norm, in my wonderful bathroom with the cold water shower head and big water bucket, with a tank in the ceiling that you fill by flicking  a button and twisting a lever…

I hung my bathers up inside, then Sara moved them outside – she being the thinker that she is understands that things dry better in the sun… me being the lazy one that I am, didn’t want to bother opening the barn doors to the back yard.

Anyhow, the important part is, that my bathers were hanging out the back and then in the evening, the bottoms were gone. Not my nice sarong, not the top, not the shorts or the t-shirt. Just the bottoms. So I think, they must’ve blown away (in the wind that was non existant…) – and seeing as I don’t get very attached to my bathers (I only buy on sale and refuse to pay more than $20 – they are just lycra  underwear… seriously… $80!!) I moved on with my life.

But then yesterday, before we went to Pangandaran, we hung out two sets of bathers that hadn’t dried inside from Monday’s swimming. We left them out on the line while we went out for the day… Now I feel it is important to note that we don’t live in a big housing complex. We live in the very quiet part of the village where the houses are quite spread apart… and no one should have to walk through someone elses garden for any reason (except the bamboo hut couple behind us who take water from our well…).

Needless to say, when we got back yesterday afternoon after makan, two pairs of bather bottoms were gone (this time they were pegged  – the wind can’t be blamed). Still out there on the line where sarongs, bather tops and a singlet. All untouched, pegged in their respective places. But the bottoms – vanished.

Who would choose to take bather bottoms is my question, and why? Firstly, bather bottoms are of no use to the girls in this part of the world – they swim fully dressed… they would never need to wear them… Secondly, you couldn’t sell them, we live in a tiny village and besides, who would you sell them to? No one wears them! Thirdly – if you did think bathers had some value – why would you not take the set? How odd. It really is a curious mystery… one I have considered laying a trap for, but seeing as both Sara and I are down to only one bather bottom each – we can’t risk losing them… they don’t sell bikini’s in this part of the world – they don’t even sell one piece bathers for girls. It’s just different lengths of shorts…

Now perverted reasons have crossed my mind… but why bathers and not underwear? The underwear is never touched, even the cool (and pricey) striped colourful bonds ones that we both got from Santa this year… it’s always pegged right where Teti left it after she kindly washed them… But bather bottoms… Really? Why? Would the fishermen wear see them as a great quick dry solution to their bum chafing worries? Surely not… their tackle wouldn’t fit…

I wonder if this mystery will ever be solved, or if we will just have to resign ourselves to not hanging out bather bottoms…

Barefoot inked, and if another goes missing, bare bummed too.

One Response to “the curious case of the bather bottom thief.”
  1. sara says:

    haha … bare bummed …. you’re great. good ready peanut. look forward to getting you back here and reading more. i’m so happy you love it here. x

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